The Queen has requested that everybody with a knighthood attend a meeting at Windsor Castle. Speaking to the sizeable crowd of ageing actors and retired musicians, she explains why – The dragons are back, and she expects that every knight will do his duty.
Everyone turns and looks at Ian McKellen.
“Oh Christ,” he says. “If only Christopher Lee were still here. Then we might have a chance.”
Dame Judi Dench stands up and cracks her knuckles. “Fine, then, if you’re all too chicken… come on, Maggie, let’s do this.”
Dame Helen Mirren is all over this. It’s her time to shine, and she is ready.
Eager to make sure the knights still have a part in the battle, Elton serenades the Dames’ victory with song, wearing his heraldic regalia from Kingsman 2.
The Queen has requested that everybody with a knighthood attend a meeting at Windsor Castle. Speaking to the sizeable crowd of ageing actors and retired musicians, she explains why – The dragons are back, and she expects that every knight will do his duty.
Everyone turns and looks at Ian McKellen.
“Oh Christ,” he says. “If only Christopher Lee were still here. Then we might have a chance.”
Dame Judi Dench stands up and cracks her knuckles. “Fine, then, if you’re all too chicken… come on, Maggie, let’s do this.”
Dame Maggie Smith grabs her wand from the Harry Potter movies that she stole. She exclaims that she will properly stab them in the eyes if she has to.
The Queen has requested that everybody with a knighthood attend a meeting at Windsor Castle. Speaking to the sizeable crowd of ageing actors and retired musicians, she explains why – The dragons are back, and she expects that every knight will do his duty.
Everyone turns and looks at Ian McKellen.
“Oh Christ,” he says. “If only Christopher Lee were still here. Then we might have a chance.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake. Stand aside, you lot!”
The crowd of knights parts, revealing Dames Maggie Smith, Judy Dench and Helen Mirren, all of whom are dressed in leather and ready to fuck shit up.
“Honestly, Ian,” Maggie Smith mutters. “Really.”
As the Dames stride past a suitably chastened Ian McKellen, Michael Gambon produces a folding chair, a hip flask and an immensely pleased expression.
“Told you,” he says, taking a seat. “Did anyone bring any biscuits?”
Elton John roars up in a gilded Rolls Royce, McCartney in tow.
“Sorry I’m late. The phone reception was terrible. Something about giant reptiles? What are we waiting for? Come on Paul, let’s rock these crocodiles!”
The Queen has requested that everybody with a knighthood attend a meeting at Windsor Castle. Speaking to the sizeable crowd of ageing actors and retired musicians, she explains why – The dragons are back, and she expects that every knight will do his duty.
Everyone turns and looks at Ian McKellen.
“Oh Christ,” he says. “If only Christopher Lee were still here. Then we might have a chance.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake. Stand aside, you lot!”
The crowd of knights parts, revealing Dames Maggie Smith, Judy Dench and Helen Mirren, all of whom are dressed in leather and ready to fuck shit up.
“Honestly, Ian,” Maggie Smith mutters. “Really.”
As the Dames stride past a suitably chastened Ian McKellen, Michael Gambon produces a folding chair, a hip flask and an immensely pleased expression.
“Told you,” he says, taking a seat. “Did anyone bring any biscuits?”
A tin appears in his peripheral vision, shiny and golden. He looks up to find a lopsided grin curling across the lips of Dame Diana Rigg, impish gleam in her eyes. “Your biscuits… Sir Michael?”
The Queen has requested that everybody with a knighthood attend a meeting at Windsor Castle. Speaking to the sizeable crowd of ageing actors and retired musicians, she explains why – The dragons are back, and she expects that every knight will do his duty.
Everyone turns and looks at Ian McKellen.
“Oh Christ,” he says. “If only Christopher Lee were still here. Then we might have a chance.”
Dame Judi Dench stands up and cracks her knuckles. “Fine, then, if you’re all too chicken… come on, Maggie, let’s do this.”
Dame Helen Mirran and Dame Julie Andrews have already brought the car around.
The Queen has requested that everybody with a knighthood attend a meeting at Windsor Castle. Speaking to the sizeable crowd of ageing actors and retired musicians, she explains why – The dragons are back, and she expects that every knight will do his duty.
Everyone turns and looks at Ian McKellen.
“Oh Christ,” he says. “If only Christopher Lee were still here. Then we might have a chance.”
Sir Terry Pratchett rises from the grave, delighted. This is his moment.
andtheytoldustotellyouhello 