Just so we’re clear: People Magazine’s sadly predictable celebration of white American mediocrity aside, we all know that Idris Elba is, unequivocally, without any dispute, the sexiest man alive, right? Like, I don’t even mean this as an issue of personal preference. I am literally just making a statement of objective fact based on scientific evidence which suggests more people would hypnotically follow a pan flute-playing Idris Elba out of a village never to be seen again than any other male celebrity.