@legendsaresooftenwarnings requested: “Or the reader is a shy noble girl engaged to oberyn and she can’t stop blushing and stuttering but she grows to care for him?”
AND
“Or a fluffy one where they take a bath together on their wedding day after the bedding?”
warnings:
{I thought I could combine these two requests into one (slightly changing the both), and fulfill a request that’s been on my dash since the beginning of the blog. Hope you enjoy!}
You weren’t used to the attention you received being at Oberyn’s side. You’d gone from being the unknown daughter of a Dornish lord, to being the sidearm of one of the most notoriously independent men in the Seven Kingdoms, and that turned a lot of heads. Men and women gossiped and tore into you, searching every scrap of your past to find something to discredit you, and conjured what they could not find.
Oberyn had found you, only a month into your engagement, hidden in an empty bedroom, wiping your red eyes after a former fling of his had cornered you and accused you of being a venomous snake who’d stolen the love of her life from her. He comforted you, and removed the woman who’d inflicted such pain, reassuring you that you were to be his wife, and while you wouldn’t be his only lover, you were his priority.
Daario lit a cigarette, watching you redress in the corner of the room, moonlight flooding in through the far window, and wisps of smoke collecting in the air. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
You hugged your shirt to your chest, feeling filthy and used. This was the third time he’d invited you over ‘just to talk’, and the third time he’d coaxed you into bed. “I can’t keep doing this. It’s not fair to her.”
“Danaerys is out of town every other week, it’s not like she’ll find out!” He slid out of the bed, approaching you and moving to grab your hands. “Baby.” He frowned as you pulled away.
“No. That’s not going to work this time. You need to choose, Daario. Me, or her?”
{This is one of my favorite series to write at the moment, and since I’m flowing with inspiration at the moment, here’s part three.}
You could feel the tangle of his limbs with yours, and a slight nausea tickling the back of your throat as you rested in the shadow of your ‘reunion’.
Robb had proven a more than able lover, no different than the last time you’d laid together. His arms were snug around your waist as he kissed up your shoulder.
You felt unnerved at how easily he’d grown to trust you, forgetting weeks of torment and misery the moment you’d implied that you had any meaning behind your actions. It was easy being married to him, as easy as breathing, because he so badly wanted you to harmonize with him, he bent over backwards to achieve his intended bliss. In the afterglow, you had difficulty finding your words, but he was quicker to recover.
One of my favorites is when a religious converter type comes up to me when I’m sitting around. Because they usually have a cold open like “The Lord has called me to you” replying with “Indeed He Has My Child, for He is Pleased With Your Work, and wishes you to know that you are known to Him”. Throw inflections into the wrong points in words, but do it with a very calming presence. After all, you’re the SMS from the afterlife, you’re merely the vessel of the vassal, and nothing scuttles their plans faster than trying to have to process that this very calmly spoken person who InflEcts their words JuiSSSSt quite not riGHt is acknowleding them in an uncomforting way.
Once they leave, watch them until something blocks the line of site, and then move like lightning to not be there when they glance back.
(This is why there are probably some really good rumours in Adelaide about me)
I remember this guy once who tried to dare me (the nerd of the group) to do something or another to prove my “manliness”. I calmly replied “How cute of you to think I´m human…” and kept walking. He stared at me in confusion and when I was several meters away I heard him say “yeah…good point.”
I have absolutely done this. I also call people “mammal”. Mostly I’ve done this one online, but it still throws people.
I’ve also been at protests opposite fundie nutjobs who told me I was going to Hell, and the look on their face is always priceless when I respond with “I know” or “I sure hope so” or something similar, which I’ve done a few times.
Once at a protest I spent about 20-30 minutes explaining Oberon Zell Ravenheart’s “Other People” argument (that the Bible explicitly states that Cain met people who weren’t related to Eve and Hell and salvation don’t apply to their descendants) to the pastor’s daughter and she was so shook she went home early and never came to that particular annual event again.
And in conversation with friends (whether they know I’m dragonkin or not) I routinely refer to “humans” as “they” and don’t include myself. I think most of them have gotten used to it.
I now want to be told that I’m going to hell, simply so I can reply with “We all must return home at some point. I am no exception” and then just walk away.
I’ve been told I’m going to hell by a rabidly homophobic preacher who used to come on to my college campus to scream about women with short hair and tight pants and, what do you know, I was a woman with short hair and tight pants. Also very goth, very pale and very smoking where I wasn’t supposed to.
“Yeah, but you’ll get there first. Tell Lucy not to get use to keeping my seat warm, yeah?”
I don’t think he came back for two semesters and he stopped yelling on the lawn between the library and the student union entrance closest to the coffee shop.
A/N: Commission series for @squishysib . This will be a 5 part series! Let me know if you want to be tagged!
Warnings: NSFW//18ANDOVER//SMUTT
Summary: Black Sails AU: You are the girlfriend of James Flint, charmstic yet ruthless leader of a local gang. Being the ‘apple’ of Flint’s eye, you are number one on the target list for opposing gang leader, Charles Vane. He wants to get a hold of Flint’s territory and you are the answer to all his problems – little does he know, Flint has wandering eyes and you are the last thing he’s worried about.
For the record while ATLA is an excellent show and Zukos redemption arc was perfectly paced, I would kill to have had Zuko join the Gaang at the end of book two, because the first half of book three would have been the funniest thing on the planet. Like. Just picture it. A bunch of unsupervised teenagers travelling undercover through enemy territory, trying to blend in… and the only people who have even been there before are 1. A guy who hasnt been there in a century, and 2. The former crown prince who has literally never spoken to a fire nation citizen who wasnt nobility, military, or one of his servants.
Like. Neither of them have any idea what they’re doing, or how normal fire nation citizens act, but they’re pretty sure the other one is wrong. Rest of the gaang knows even less. No adults. Zuko and Aang getting into a shouting debate over the finer points of fire nation culture is a nightly event. They are both so wrong, and so, so awkward
Zuko, for the fifth and probably not last time: FOR THE LAST TIME, NOBODY USES THE PHRASE ‘FLAMEO HOTMAN’!
Aang, aware of that fact but in too deep to back out now: OH YEAH? THEN WHAT DO THEY SAY!?
Zuko, clueless and bluffing: …Something about glory to the Fire Lord?
Toph, well aware that both are lying through their teeth and have no idea what they’re talking about, and fucking loving every second of this train wreck: Clearly the only solution is for both of you to go into town tomorrow and test your theories out.
And the side taking, oh my god the side taking from the other three. Katara sides with Aang every single time. Does she honestly believe that the people of the Fire Nation greet each other with ‘Flame on, my em-brother’? Hell no. Would she rather die than say that Zuko’s correct? Yes.
Sokka usually sides with Zuko, unless he comes up with something astoundingly stupid. Zuko’s thoughts, while usually wrong, sound a lot more plausible then Aangs, and fuck it he’s willing to take a gamble.
Toph is the closest thing to a neutral party they have, in that she knows damn well they’re all full of shit, and has chosen to instead egg them on to make it worse. She’s an agent of chaos, and this is free nightly entertainment. She’s having the time of her life right now.
The debate takes a brief pause once they stop going undercover and get to the business of actually saving the world, but holy shit. once things have settled down? it’s back on with a vengeance. Except now Aang and Zuko aren’t the two most wanted people in the Fire Nation, they’re the two most influential people in the world. They are trendsetters. They can make slang become a thing.
When Zuko first hears the phrase ‘flameo, hotman’ being thrown around casually, it takes a lot of deep breathing exercises to not immediately return to his previous occupation of hunting the Avatar.
Iroh: I’m so proud of the way you’ve been ruling, nephew. Flameo, hotman!
@legendsaresooftenwarnings requested: “how about one where Jon Snow has a twin that he leaves behind when he goes to the wall?”
Warnings: incestuous behavior, some cursing
Old wives’ tales stated that twins were two halves of one soul, split forever between the two bodies, never allowing one to be complete without the other.
This was certainly true in regards to you and Jon.
You trusted him completely, consulting him on everything from the colored ribbons in your hair to your indifference towards the King.
Anonymous requested: “Could you do a Jojen Reed x Reader please?”
WARNINGS: a bit of OOC Jojen? It’s au, so it sort of comes with the territory.
{This is a bit of an au, so here’s some background. The Starks are the Kings of the North, and Jojen is a court-seer treated as a prophet by some. Y/N is servant within the castle, and well, you.}
You’d only seen the seer a few times.He’d enter, speak softly to the King, and leave just as quickly as he’d come. He never went to the feasts that you tended to, and was often absent from tourneys. He was something of an enigma within a court, an extraordinary individual from an ordinary beginning who seemed to fully capture the King’s attention whenever he sought it. That was enviable enough, forgetting his boyish good-looks, and his apparent charm.
Anonymous requested; “The Reader is the trueborn daughter of Robert and Cersei. She is betrothed to Robb at a young age and is sent to Winterfell soon after. She grows up beside her future husband and both are utterly in love. They get… physical a few years before they are supposed to marry and the reader falls pregnant. How do the families react?”
Warnings: pregnancy, mentions of pre-marital sex,
You’d loved Robb since you were a child. You’d loved him since the day he confronted you in the courtyard of Winterfell, thrusted three winter-roses into your hands and pressing an painfully awkward kiss to your cheek before scurrying back to Theon- red in the face.
The thorns had been digging into your palms, but all you could do was stare after him, floored.
It was a few months before you had garnered the courage to return the sentiment. A girl of three and ten, you weren’t yet inventive, but you’d caught him staring enough times to know that his feelings had not yet faded.
andtheytoldustotellyouhello 