holy fuuuuck i want to see M’Baku’s reaction to Wakanda taking part in the Olympics
he would hit. the. fucking. roof. t’challa would start hiding out in shuri’s lab because otherwise M’Baku would be lying in wait for him around every corner, ready to loom over him and bellow about the shame of it, the shame of participating in this disgraceful Western farce run by corrupt bureaucrats and denigrated by colonial governments who force their athletes to cheat, this abomination that achieves naught but squandered resources and the enrichment of the few at the expense of the many.
then when t’challa says that, ‘well, fine, I understand and respect your feelings brother, perhaps the Jabari could stage an act of peaceful protest by refusing to participate? :)’
and fucking smoke issues forth from M’Baku’s nostrils and his eyes turn blood-red and he roars at the top of his lungs that how dare T’Challa try to humiliate his people by suggesting that they not be counted among the top sportsmen in the world, there will be recompense for this insult!!!!!!!
and then he storms off and tells his best warriors to start training right the fuck now before he has them all flayed, and a few months later the Jabari have won gold medals in every event
‘pah. these trinkets mean nothing,’ says M’Baku, wearing seventeen of them
Ok but consider: Nakia wreaking absolute havoc on the Olympic Committee in a series of devastating board meetings and equally devastating outfits
What? You’re used to having indentured servants build the arenas because they have to work off their citizenship sponsorship? That’s cool, Wakanda will sponsor visas for literally all of them right now so we can pay them a fair wage and they can work for the civil service after the games. Oh we need to talk about the supposed ~issue~ of trans athletes? Don’t worry, Wakanda drafted legislation protecting trans and two-spirit people centuries ago, just sign here :)) sweetie :))) Yes Thank you we’ll take the IOC’s money the exit is this way
And you better believe they would not let those announcements happen in French. Like. I mean maybe Nakia would be nice about it to their faces but there’s no WAY they’re gonna make anyone listen to that colonizer language, so Shuri is in charge of tech for the games and OOPS something goes wrong with the microphones so that any French is automatically translated into Wakandan, sorry Mr President what a silly mistake I can’t i m a g i n e how that happened
Meanwhile the Dora Milaje have all won at least two medals each, except Okoye, who is nominally on guard duty with T’Challa but is actually watching Wakanda kick the world’s ass from the best seats in the stadium and cackling
upon learning Shuri is 16 in Black Panther, I quietly revise all my original shipping plans from “adults” to “Shuri is a hopeless baby lesbian with a crush on every single Dora Milaje and soon a big useless enormous crush on MJ, who is like a semi competent but mostly just grungy bisexual with a super popular twitter account that Shuri is obsessed with and MJ is s t o k e d about everything about Wakanda and tweets that she’s doing her senior research project on Wakandan tech and T’Challa, who follows his baby sister’s online crush’s twitter so he can forward Shuri the most embarrassing tweets that will make her furious (“YES BROTHER I DID SEE THAT SELFIE AND I DON’T NEED YOU TO REMIND ME OFF IT”), is like “this is the moment I was born for. This is why I became king” and tweets MJ like “we’re doing youth outreach, come to Wakanda, my very talented and smart and accomplished sister will give you a personal tour :)” and MJ and Shuri simultaneously die”
the Dora Milaje prepping for MJ’s visit by giving Shuri different and conflicting romantic advice until Okoye tells them it is against their sacred duty to torment the princess into a crush-induced panic attack because she cannot decide between her top twelve outfits and cool confident quips for making a good first impression
MJ meanwhile with Peter is repeatedly punching him in the arm because he just told her that he met T’Challa and she’s furious this hasn’t come up before, and also he’s Spider-man, but that’s not nearly as important as KING T’CHALLA WHAT, DID HE TALK ABOUT HIS SISTER AT ALL, MJ’S BEEN FOLLOWING ARTICLES ABOUT HER FOR YEARS AND SHE SEEMS DOPE AND CUTE AS HELL
Shuri, so excited and nervous that 10 percent of her attention is freaking out about how she can smell MJ oh no she smells so good, and 70 percent is on trying not to jitter so hard she thrums into a new plane of existence (and then the remaining 20 percent for figuring out cold fusion, nbd): HELOO M-UH-MMM- MICHELLE. DO YOU PREFER TO BE CALLED MICHELLE AND WELCOME TO MY BEAUTIFUL COUNTRY OF WAKANDA. WOULD YOU LIKE TO PHOTO WITH IT FOR YOUR INTERNET FRIENDS. I AM SHURI. YOU MUST KNOW THAT ALREADY. HAHA MY BROTHER TOLD YOU ABOUT ME. I WILL MURDER HIM.
MJ, who has spent the last ten minutes hiding in the bathroom applying deodorant to basically every non-face part of her body because she can’t stop sweating oh my god stop sweating you’re sweating on a three hundred year old chair in a sitting room in a palace in fuckin WAKANDA, and who is so stressed that she’s transcended the human for and is now astral projecting somewhere behind her own body, distantly pitying this new york punk gremlin who thought Formal Plaid was a good idea talk to a real ass honest to god genuine princess with a beautiful smile holding a small cat robot that she hand designed this afternoon on a whim: dope. I love murder. call me MJ
tchalla hacks buckys phone location so he knows where he is if and when he wants to beat his ass
he just gets bored and he’s like hmmmmmm bucky’s only two miles away frm me time for pain buck boi
forget the tony and steve man pain, i want to just see scenes of Bucky standing in the self checkout line with a loaf of bread and TP then suddenly tchalla is there throwing a shopping cart at his ass and they start fighting. bucky in the bathroom washing his hands calmly before tchalla kicks the door open and they start fighting. tchalla having a sandwich in the park until he sees bucky coming then he throws it at his face and then they start fighting.
Bucky’s about to dive in the pool, T’Challa runs up, drop kicks his ass and flips out of the splash zone.
it’s very important to me that sometimes t’challa is in a high-level but very boring cabinet meeting about grain prices or smth and his secret Danger Phone goes off and he glances down at it and then grimly says, “i must go.” and everyone’s like, wow. our strong and brave prince. off to protect Wakanda in her hour of need again. meanwhile t’challa’s just hit bucky barnes with a SPECTACULAR flying clothesline outside a Home Depot in bed-stuy
andtheytoldustotellyouhello 