Saw this post about straight dudes feeling emasculated at the thought of taking their wife’s last name, and it gave me a sudden craving for fantasy media where some dude is called Leopold THE DESTROYER or some shit and there are all these rumors going around about how he got his moniker, all these made up stories about how he must have razed a village to the ground or slayed 12 dragons or some shit and it turns out he just took his wife’s last name.
“What was your name before?”
“Meadowalker.”
“…”
“I miss it sometimes y’know, but eh,” he smiles wistfully as he looks over to where his wife is sharpening her sword. “What can you do when you marry for love.”
God should fear girls with battle scars.
Pretty little things with knives hidden in their smiles,
blood red lips and poison-painted nails.
They’ve been to the gates of Hell –
and the Devil sent them back,
armed and ready to fight.
in every conceivable way orlando bloom seems like someone’s oc, like he was the design of an arrogant young human mind and not the universe’s cruel game of chance
“he’s a famous actor. he got famous playing the elf in lord of the rings. he’s unsettlingly pretty and he doesn’t age. he punched justin bieber. his name is orlando jonathan blanchard bloom and he was named after a famous baroque composer. original character do not steal”
andtheytoldustotellyouhello 