AN: This is a part two to Betrayal, which was originally a request from my 1k Celebration. There was a large request for a part two, so I happily obliged 😊 I do want to make a disclaimer that I do not condone cheating even in the slightest! I’ve been cheated on numerous times before, and it’s one of the worst things you can do to someone you care about. Anyways, I hope you guys enjoy it!
It had been a couple of days since you had woken up in Brian’s room. You hadn’t heard from Brian or Roger, so you had no idea how things had gone between the two of them. You had hoped that Roger had listened to you and placed all the blame on you. You still didn’t remember who had initiated the decision of you going home with Brian, but it didn’t matter. Brian was his best friend and his band mate. You were just a girl who could easily be replaced. You had proven that you weren’t trustworthy enough.
You had locked yourself in your apartment, and hadn’t stepped outside since you got back from Roger’s flat. Your hair was greasy and pulled up into a messy bun on the top of your head, and you were wearing a sweater that Roger had left at your place. You knew that you were just torturing yourself by wearing something that smelled like him, but you didn’t care. You wanted to mourn the loss of one of the best relationships you had ever had. You wanted to hurt. You wanted to hold on to that last piece of him for as long as you could.
You were sat on your couch, a tub of ice cream in your hand, watching a cheesy drama on the television when there was a knock on your door. Your hand froze over your spoon, and your wide eyes turned towards the door. You hadn’t been expecting any visitors. You thought that you had been successful in shutting everyone out by not answering your phone and never calling anyone back. There was a moment of silence, in which you turned your attention back to the tv, when there was another, more insistent knocking.
Slowly, you set your ice cream on the coffee table in front of you, and grabbed a pair of sweatpants that were hanging over the arm of the couch and slipped them on. Another knock rang out through the apartment, and you grew even more confused over who could want you to answer so badly. Finally, you made it to the door, undid the locks and hesitantly pulled it open. Your heart stopped when your eyes landed on the man standing on the other side.
Roger’s normally beautiful blond hair was a mess, and his eyes were downcast on the floor in front of him. When he heard the lock slide open, his eyes lifted and you were shocked at the dark circles around them. He looked tired, he looked lost, and when he saw you, he just looked sad.
“Roger? What are you doing here?” You asked quietly, still hiding yourself partly behind the door. He didn’t respond, but only motioned his hand towards you as if asking if he could come in. You gave him a small nod and pulled the door open farther so that he could squeeze through.
You immediately became aware of how big of a mess your apartment was. You hadn’t bothered taking out the trash and there were empty pizza boxes and take-out cartons cluttering your dining room table. You watched as Roger looked at the mess around him, and even though your apartment was filled with junk, you knew that it didn’t look nearly as bad as you did.
“I talked to Brian.” Roger said quietly, as his eyes landing on you again.
“Roger, please don’t be mad at him. It was all my fault, and it was a stupid mistake-“
“Funny. He said the same thing about you. Claimed he was the one who made the first move.”
Your stomach dropped and you could feel confusion taking over your features. Why would Brian say something like that? Maybe he was just trying to protect you like you were trying to protect him. You didn’t know what else to say. You really didn’t have any idea on what happened, as much as you wished you could give Roger an explanation.
“I never wanted to hurt you, Roger.”
His normally brilliant, lively blue eyes stared back at you seemingly lifeless. You could tell that, like you, he hadn’t been sleeping. You felt nervous under his gaze as he continued to stay silent. You wanted to know what he was thinking. You wanted him to tell you why he was here. You had resigned yourself to the fact that he would never speak to you again. You sure didn’t deserve it. Roger quietly made his way over to your couch and took a seat on it.
“It’s also funny, because I believe you. I’ve always been the one on your side of this situation, so I never realized how bad it hurt to be on the receiving end.” You felt a pang in your chest at the sadness in his voice. He was rubbing his face with his hand, his eyes didn’t meet yours. “I miss you, YN.”
Your heart flipped and you couldn’t stop yourself from taking a step closer to him. He had stopped rubbing his face, but he was only looking at his hands. He should have been angry with you. You didn’t want to delude yourself into believing that he was really going to forgive you. When you didn’t say anything, Roger looked back up at you.
“As much as I want to hate you, I still love you.” There was a strain to his voice, and you could see the unshed tears forming in his eyes. The sight caused a lump in your throat, and you felt you knees go weak. You hadn’t allowed yourself to cry all day, trying to accept the fact that he was gone. But now, you took a seat on the end of the couch farthest away from him, and you felt a tear run down your cheek.
“I never stopped loving you, Rog. I have never imagined myself with anyone but you, and I wish that I could take back what happened. It was a mistake, and I can assure you that there were never any feelings between Brian and I.”
He nodded stiffly, as he inched towards you, and his hand reached out to brush the tears away from your eyes. Your breathing faltered at his touch and your eyes slipped shut at the sensation that spread through your body. While you couldn’t remember the night you spent with Brian, you knew that anything that two of you had done had not felt even remotely close to how it felt just to have one of Roger’s fingers flutter across your skin.
“I don’t know if I can move past this very quickly.” He whispered, and you could feel the couch dip down as he scooted closer to you. You still hadn’t opened your eyes. “But I really don’t know if I can move on without you.”
Your eyes snapped open, and you became fully aware of just how close Roger was. His eyes were scanning your face, and you could now make out the redness of his eyes and the frown lines that were growing ever prominent near his mouth.
You weren’t sure if you should, but you slowly lifted your hand to press gently against his cheek. He leaned into your touch and you felt like you couldn’t breathe. It had only been two days, but they had been the loneliest two days of your life. Without Roger, you had been ready to completely give up. But here he was, giving you hope.
“I love you.” You whispered, your thumb rubbing gentle circles against his cheek. You didn’t need him to respond. You didn’t need him to say anything, because you just wanted him to hear you. You needed him to know how you felt, and how you had always felt. “I would spend forever making this up to you if I could.”
You hadn’t ever seen the vulnerable look at that was now on Roger’s face. His cheek was still pressed firmly against your palm, and his eyes were wide as he stared at you. Every feature in his face had softened and you couldn’t help but feel like he looked like a small boy. The image both warmed and hurt your heart.
“Forever is an awfully long time.” He murmured, his eyes never leaving yours.
“Not nearly long enough.”
Then, for the first time in days, Roger smiled. Your heart leapt in your chest and you couldn’t stop yourself from smiling back. You knew that this wasn’t over. The two of you had a lot of things you needed to work through, and you understood that it may take a while before Roger could completely trust you again. But when he looked at you, and you could see the love in his eyes, you knew that the struggle would be worth it. You were going to keep your word and prove to him that he was the only one for you. Even if it did take forever.
andtheytoldustotellyouhello 